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Penelope
IFC Films, 101mins, TBA

Directed by
Mark Palansky
Prosthetic makeup is really important in fantasy films. Miracles
have been done in this art, and the Oscars won in this category have
been well deserved. It can literally make or break a film. A bad
makeup job can ruin the illusion, which in turn can make an
otherwise good film a complete waste. What can work as a stage play
cannot work as a film, which is something that makes this work so
frustrating. The makeup totally sucks.
The pre-credits introduction is great. The ancestors are cursed by a
witch(Michael Feast) for being too stuck up: The first daughter will
have the face of a pig! But over a century passes (all sons, an
illegitimate daughter, etc.), before Franklin(Richard E. Grant) and
Jessica Wilhern(Catherine O'Hara) become the victims of the curse
and Penelope(Christina Ricci) is born. Here's the problem. The
makeup sucks. Ricci with a pig-nose is still more beautiful than
most women with normal faces, and the whole premise falls apart due
to this oversight in prosthetics.
When the action really starts, Penelope is in her early 20s and is
kept in seclusion, while various upper-class twits woo her from
behind a two way mirror where she can't be seen. We meet one of
them, Edward Vanderman, III(Simon Woods) as he and Penelope have a
tender conversation before she reveals herself and he flees in
terror. He escapes and going to the local constabulary, he makes his
report. Everyone thinks he's mad except for a certain Mr.
Lemon(Peter Dinklage), who had lost an eye investigating the case
years before. Of course, in order to get proof, they need a photo of
this were-pig. So they hire a down and out blue-blood named
Max(James McAvoy), who's real name is Johnny, but that's another
plotline we don't have to discuss here, and a strange peudo-romance
takes place. This fails and Penelope escapes on her own, meets up
with Annie(Reese Witherspoon as a biker chick, and finds herself
[No! Not in that way!]
Again, if the prosthetics were correct, and Penelope were a genuine
monster instead of a really cute gal with a wider-than-average nose,
the relatively intelligent script would have worked. Yeah, this is
an indie film and the budget isn't as large as a major Hollywood
production, but there's plenty of money onscreen, and they could
have scrimped a bit on one or two other places and they could have
really had a nice monster and almost the same quality of scenery.
Yeah, it's a small thing, but in that world of illusion known as the
movies, looks are everything. Even though that's what the writers
are railing against. What a waste of talent.
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