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Link
Yaco! We don’t live
in the United States, we live... There's no evidence that these new "first" Americans made it as far east as Manhattan, but it is not out of the question. They were very possibly of Russian stock. I try to imagine one of these folks, with a beetle-browed Leonid Breshnev countenance, stalking through the wilds of the Village, in his leather pants and leather vest…HEY! That outfit is still in vogue! Curiously, I see a lot of young people wearing those leather pants in August. No wonder their thighs are so slim. Whew, that's got to be hot! In the early 17th century, the Dutch bought out the local interests. Almost a century later, the British took over. Then those darn colonists took matters into their own hands. These weren't British proper. There were a lot of Irish, Scots, and Germans. There were even a handful of Blacks. Not many know that Portuguese whalers from the Cape Verde Islands off the coast of Africa were visiting New England that long ago and left a substantial presence in these here united states. In the mid-18th century, life really began to change. They built everything above 14th street. Down here, in the Village, that's the real New York. That new town, arranged in those anal-retentive grids of streets, that's just a glorified suburb of the Village. And the heavy immigrations began. There were Irish fleeing the potato famine, Italians fleeing poverty, Jews fleeing pogroms and conscription in the Czar's army, and many others. At the turn of the century, the floodgates really opened. Another surprise here--I've always assumed all the Jewish folk came straight to New York Harbor but it seems that Texas also had a busy harbor. As well, Jewish immigrant communities sprang up in unlikely places like Columbus, Ohio. Yet another twist--not all the Native Americans got chased out of the Eastern Seaboard. By treaty and compromise, small pockets of these folk remain in place to this day. They still have a presence here in the Village--the children and grandchildren of the high-altitude construction workers who came here to build the Empire State Building. A lot of New York state Mohawks came to town in the hey-day of "sky-scraper" building. It's amazing to think that they built the Empire State Building in ONE year. These days it takes that long just to file the paperwork on an apartment renovation in the historic district. What did they know that we don't? In today's modern times, most of the Villagers I meet came from the flatlands of the Mid-West. They all speak with the nasal, twangy ,drawling vowels of Illinois, Ohio, and Michigan. I know an Israeli couple who are shocked to hear those drawn-out vowels issuing from their child's mouth. The Village accent these days is more likely to be Mid-western…or even Middle-Eastern, than the dese-dem-dose patois of the Film Noir era. Now it's "thee-ays, thay-em, tho-oohse." And slowly, the Village is becoming more Mid-Western in culture. Small crowded, over-priced shops with slow and rude service used to be the accepted norm here. Now we've got a K-mart! The grocery store aisles are still a quarter the size of those in a mini-mall in the flatlands, but sometimes you can actually find a clerk who will give you the time of day. Hardcore old-timers resent the encroachment of convenience and economy into the traditionally uncomfortable and difficult culture of our little Village. Chain stores and franchises are ruining our way of life. What happened to the good old days when it took four hours to buy a screwdriver? Where are the gum-chewing, blank-eyed, sullen cashiers of yesteryear? You know, the one who, when you asked them if their store carried screwdrivers would answer, "Why? What do you want it for?" Gosh, I'll miss them. Laissez-faire, baby. It's the monoculture, making the world safe for a global economy and t-shirts with corporate logos. But don't panic. We still have 14th street where, in the usually over-priced New York, you can buy cassette players and shirts for a few dollars each. They're brand new, fresh from the factories in Bulgaria and Malaysia. My $15 cassette player has a mysterious LBS button on it. I wonder what that stands for in Tagalog? Whenever I press nothing happens but my downstairs neighbor starts thumping on her ceiling with a broomstick. Link Yaco has written comic books for several publishers. He is currently working on a couple comics-related paperbacks. He has been a copywriter, technical writer, newspaper journalist, and magazine entertainment writer. He has a Masters' degree in Telecommunications and was a technical manager at MIT for five years. Link lives in West Greenwich Village with his wife, Susannah, a Senior Vice President at an independent film company. Check out his web page here Read last week's column Visit Link Yaco Home Page COPYRIGHT 1999 LINK YACO. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
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richard e. schiff,
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